You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
Since she's grinding up on your thigh right now, I'm sending you this text hoping it makes your phone vibrate in her vagina
No, a stripper letting you buy her dinner is not the same as a girlfriend.
im pretty sure all they do is fuck. and talk in baby talk. its two babys fucking basically.
the russians are downstairs with the vodka loudly proclaiming happy birthday america. i don't care if it's the fourth, i care that it's 9 am and they woke me up.
just explained the breakup in detail to my big toes. that consolation brownie was Amazing.
i just remember pinky promising you guys to take care of him.
It was just like old times except for going to hangover throw up before waking my parents up to open presents. Merry Christmas!
I told your dad we had a nice lunch and hung out for awhile. It seemed more appropriate than "I had a bite of his canned chili and then we ripped each others clothes off."
But seriously who drew a dick on a tortilla and nailed it to the door?
congrats on being the token straight people in our group.
What, That's like a total 7 inches of cock and 6 are from Joe. Don't be mad at me because you had the lamest orgy ever.
i just cleaned my bong... I do not feel healthy
he would NOT stop making out with my stomach! creeeeeepy
I never thought I'd be on my couch watching Star Trek, getting my tits rubbed while crying.
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