Once you see the odd facial expressions and noises a guy makes while he is furiously beating off on top of you, it kind of puts things into perspective.
Did you know nanny-cams work just as well for recording that blow job on the sofa?
You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
there was a trapeze. enough said
Now you know for the next time you go in the basement to wear a helmet
Cats found the secret coke stash again
They owe us $80.
Both our collective sex appeal dies once someone cums on a snuggie kayla
After much deliberatipn and vodka, my favourite phrase of Christmas 2012 is "penis of last resort"
I don't know if I want context or not...
Context involves faux incest and champagne. Id go into detail but im on shot number 5.
note to self: do not snort crushed up caffeine pills in the bathroom by yourself when ur super shit faced, ur face will fucking hate you in the morning.
I woke up on some strangers couch covered in salad mix and oatmeal cream pies. The struggle is absolutely real.
So apparently, after 11 beers, 2 pitchers of sangria and 3 rhum & cokes, the idea of popping a load of MD and jumping on the trampoline, in the woods, in my underwear was the best one ever.
I'm never going to adult. I'm staying a child. The only thing related to adult that I want to do is you.
You'd be proud...I've an early morning wake up booty call...he should be here around 6am ish...I told him to wake me nicely.
Get the fuck in, we're going to Taco Bell.
My bald co-worker just chugged a literal gallon of coffee. My condolences to his kidneys.
Randomize
