i think i've said "don't judge me" 10+ times tonight... is that a bad thing?
yes
... don't judge me
question - sack: should she or should she not play with it during foreplay?
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
I have no idea how to attract men with my personality anymore. He can't see my tits via facebook chat
Boxed wine mondays was one of our finer ideas
Don't be alarmed at the girl laying on your bathroom floor.
Showing up to Easter hungover, late, and covered in black an blues from pole dancing. Daughter of the year.
I lost my bar virginty and made out with a dwarf. It was a good night
My actions are not mine. They are the actions of Patron.
I knew it was you who came home last night because no one else would walk in at 3 am and start microwaving a burrito
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
Dude she passed out on the floor so you covered her with a blanket to make sure "no one would notice her"
And when she started moving around and making noises you told everyone, "it's okay, it's just my roomba under there".......
I currently hiding in an upside down garbage can please come find me
He fucked the hangover right out of me. That good.
Randomize
