ill give you a foot job if you come over before 4
After I made out with her she fell asleep and started pooting in her sleep. Are we sure lesbians are hot? Cause that wasn't.
You'll be the first to get a "it's herpes simplex 1" cigar.
i think i got so emotional from a mix of getting my period and slapping the bag like five times
We have video of him nailing the sex doll to my wall and putting all the monopoly pieces in her nose
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
SORRY! Pervert came out for a bit. BAD PERVERT! BACK IN YOUR HOME!
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
You made out with both twins? Ten points to you!
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
Beer. Pizza. Seething Rage. I will be full of two of these things tonight. You get to decide which two.
You tryed convincing the salvation army bell ringer you could do the worm and face planted into the sidewalk... I put a dollar in the can for your performance
There is a sex dungeon behind the wine cellar. This is why I hate showing foreclosures.
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