Call me so I can make it juicy for ya
jusi got death stares at taco bell because I asked if Denise was working.
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
He asked if I wanted a dutch rudder. 1.) Who says that? 2.) How exactly does one do that with a girl?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
The bottle I was drinking out of splintered on the bottom, there was glass in my hand, I pulled it out with my teeth... Not the best night for Drunk Kevin
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Why is there a video on my phone of us trying to snort a line of Reeces Pieces with you chanting "This is how fat girls party"?
Well it ended with everyone taking a bite out of a raw potato and a girl crying because her boyfriend wouldn't bring her any grape juice. So yeah...I'd say the night was a success.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was cracking open beer cans, throwing them off the roof, and yelling "FRAG OUT!"
I WOKE UP IN A FUCKING DOG BED HOW DO YOU THINK I FEEL
I took did three shots of fireball and did and handstand. When I stood up some busty slut lead me my the hand down the hall into her dorm room.
But I'm sure your having and "a monumentally better time" repeating the 12th grade
you dont know your limits until you wake up with a black eye and a bruised rib and find out you got ran over by a bicycle last night
long story short, the bouquet was used as a sacrificial torch
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
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