Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
If you don't sleep with him after showing him your thong with the bow, I am no longer on your side.
i can't believe i had a foursome before a threesome
There's a big bag of salt and vinegar chips and a Budweiser for when you wake up. Don't say I never did anything for you.
We almost forgot to tip the maids, so we left the rest of the gin, some tonic water and a lime. They earned it
We bought a hamster while completely stoned and 2 hours later returned it because your mother wouldnt let you bring it in her house. You cried. a lot.
He drunk dialed me at 2am asking if he could put a baby in me.
i want to have awesome sex and feel fuzzy.
At least I got to make out with you a little before you proposed.
you walked in, put on rap music and started chugging vodka
I just watched this dude try to convince this girl to go home with him. She was like, That's cute, you're cute.and she just walked away. Man I'm so not drunk enough to be around this level of sad.
Look I'm sorry I stuffed your wife's bouquet toss but I won't have that weak shit in my house.
DICK-CITY HERE WE COME
His weed is so good that I don't wanna risk loosing him as my weed man so I plan to keep him in the friend zone 😂
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
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