Ran into that hot funeral director in the bar two days after the wake. pretty sure we drunk made out.
Grandpa would have been proud
If that really is brett favre's penis, no wonder she ignored his calls
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
i feel as uncomfortable as your camel toe looks.
What's bad is when she said "what hobo did you steal this dick from?"
I feel like I need to get a restraining order against him but I'd probably be the one to break it.
You were screaming across the bar "BUYING US SHOTS ISN'T GOING TO MAKE US STRAIGHT, YA KNOW!!!!!!!!"
I said I usually like going out for coffee before torturing someone's genitals. He said he understood.
Stop thinking your God dude. You passed out. God doesn't pass out...
i am bringing shame upon my ancesors with my weak liver valhalla will never accept me
And I just found out I called my debit card a fast food passport so I dont deserve to live
Dude hobos go hard. I learned a lot last night.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
She made me baby bird juul smoke to her while we were fucking
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
