I got wasted for the 1st time and I sat in a fridge for 2 hours and a trash can?
i just want to meat her and do terribly wonderful things to her vagina...
i just had sex bonerless
Michelle Duggar likes to fuuuuck
It's impossible to flirt with the bank tellers because they see how broke I am.
Its mothers day and I have choke marks around my neck. Thanks for that.
I just inadvertently flirted with my coworker's 20-year old son. I've known him since he was 14, yet suddenly he looked different.
You are nothing if not reliable.
Im still alive. Just can't talk. Or move. No need to worry
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
It's settled. One of us is going to bang her brother. The world demands justice and he's hot. We'll be the justice league if it were made of alcoholic whores
I got really adventurous too. Like. Balls in the mouth adventurous.
He found out about your side hoe and still helped you try to find a lizard that got in the house
I woke up on a different floor than I went to sleep on. Can't find my shoes.
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
