What are you wearing to our high school reunion?
I don't know, What kind of dress says "I feel sorry for you people?"
alex threw up in my bong. i'm going to call it a night.
I would have added her but her profile pic was piece of pie
I've thrown up so many times in the third floor bathroom of Baldwin that they should probably just go ahead and name it after me.
I told him I don't date guys unless they play a musical instrument. So, he's here and he brought a kazoo.
We are going out Saturday. Oh and we might also be jousting on bikes.
did mom hear me barking???
oooooh yeah. good luck explaining that one
sooo high. sooo many dog friends
Well I think I made it pretty obvious I wasn't in to it. I was drinking a beer while he was going down in me
I love you too! Remember NO alcohol or weed at my residence because of legal ramifications.
Dude I thought she was trying to turn my dick inside out
He Dutch ovened me while I was hiding under the covers from his mom. Needless to say it did not end well.
Was the guy in the cowboy hat kinda hot or have I just not had sex in a really long time?
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
You were dancing to the Bee Gees, at 3am, with a piece of ham on your head. Moral of the story, You can't drink.
We couldn't find her anywhere. Finally, I saw her sitting in my bathroom floor spraying hair mouse into her mouth and whispering "I fucking love whipped cream." WHAT DID YOU GIVE HER AND CAN I HAVE SOME?
Randomize
