Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
my way of studying for our final tomorrow: registering online to retake the class in the fall
I am not one to point fingers but since it says your name "wuz here" next to the dick drawn on my stomach I am holding you personally responsible.
He scored a 8.5/10 on that girls powerpoint. Of course I slept with him
That's not a good night. A good night is waking up with no skirt, no money, and the imprint of the edge of the bar on your forehead.
I'm going to call you, don't answer. Need to practice moaning to your answering machine again
Guess which fraternity was just playing car to car frisbee in the McDonald's drive thru! Did you guess mine?
I mean it's like...I'm sorry I slept with your boyfriend but is it my fault that he failed to mention you when I was giving him head in the Dave and Busters bathroom?
There is so much wrong with that sentence
Yeah there really shouldn't be a bar at D&B's...shit gets real
im on the hungover til tuesday pabst blue ribbon diet
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I mean in all honesty I would let James Franco shit on my chest. End of story
She got engaged last night. I don't think you should ask her out man.
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
He seems like a nice guy. I mean, I know he's married and he's essentially paying me to be his side hoe, but he really seems like a good person.
Randomize
