Let's hustle tonight so we can relax tomorrow
Perfect. Like where your heads at
By relax I mean have sex
Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
every time I hook up with him I think about the fact that penicillin was a mistake too... and look how well that turned out. It makes me feel just a little bit better.
I hope i woe up in your car, or else i stole someone elses and slept in the back seat
Apparently on the way out of the ER i asked the nurse to doggie-bag me some more morphine.
"Hung over, tired and having a faint scent of some body butter and random pieces of glitter from a girl named gigi, almost arrested in drug bust, $40 Canadian in my pocket and all i got was this lousy Tshirt" shirts dont exist, but they need to
There are walks of shame and then there are walks of what the hell is wrong with you.
i think its awesome that according to your mom i'm your friend that caught on fire.
My sister got her picture in the pub crawl section of the paper today and my dad said to me "why can't you be more like her?"
They thought "watering it down" meant adding more vodka
His wife made me pancakes and let me borrow a clean shirt. Should I drop his class or use this to my advantage
Chuck job is nothing more than to be my dick stand when I'm too drunk to hold it while pissing
I know I don't have feelings for him because I feel completely ashamed every time after we have sex
I fucked your neighbor. Welcome to the new apartment!
You kept telling everyone that you were as sober as a camel. I have yet to figure out what that means
Randomize
