Tell LD happy birthday and party like it's $19.99
Recession joke.
I'm pretty hammered, I'll elaborate tomorrow
Instead of a promise ring i got my clit peirced, its a promise that ill always give you ass! =]
at least franzia made me throw up pretty colors.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
We are the drunkest people in Toys R' Us right now
i've never smoked before...when you said wake and bake i thought you meant like a funeral bbq or something
she was like the girl next door.. if you lived next door to a whorehouse
It's amazing the difference a day and 2000 mg of antibiotic make. Nine days to go.
so hungover ... i gave my nephew five bucks to go blow bubbles for an hour in the kitchen.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
There's gotta be a lawn gnome full ecstasy around here somewhere. And by golly I will find it
well, I yelled "the tribe has spoken!" at a boatload of people and then I walked home alone in the pouring rain at 1:30am. karma really is a bitch, yo.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
I just had a random tinder dude give me a ride home from school because my car is dead. Tinder rules! It's like Uber, but with boys who want to impress you.
If we both don't have awesome filthy sexual experiences to share in the morning...we are no longer best friends.
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
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