sometimes when you bring the thunder you get lost in the storm
i kept saying "bloody hell" in a ron weasley accent until i forcibly told myself to shut up
Picture Ja Rule and 50 Cent having a sexy full grown love child son...He's on my bus right now, wearing an outside jacket with no shirt underneath. My fashion sense and libido are fighting it out.I'll keep you posted on who wins.
Last night i was so high that i came home and did a taste test of every vitamin water and wrote theyre grade down on paper.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I've blown a few things in my day
you kept lying down on the floor at the bar just to prove you could get back up
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Ok I am NOT pregnant. I could shove coal up my vagina and my uterus would turn it into a diamond in a matter of minutes
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
SHE SITS THERE LIKE A DICK LIKE AN ACTUAL DICK JUST LIMP AND DUMB AND BLAH
apparently, dueling with garden tools in Home Depot is strictly frowned upon
Today I found out that my boss keeps a breathalyzer on his desk for just these sort of shenanigans
Nobody likes ball hair. Not even gay dudes
This toilet bowl is my home.
My nipples are raw, I've yet to go to bed, I feel like death, and I'm at work. Thank you jack, crown, and Lafayette!
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