Sorry, I have to go home and feed my nepotisms
Sorry, I can't talk, there's a herd of nepotisms headed my way
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
We left the window open. My vibrators funeral is at 2ish.....bring a side dish or some shit.
She won't let me open the car door while we are on the highway so I can throw up outside. She deserves to have her car thrown up in.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
okay just a general question, but if i got arrested, who here would bail me out. this is important.
I swear with his long flowing hair and god-like body he looked like Jesus, a bong hitting Jesus
My boss just sent an employee on an hour long paid break to pick up weed for our 'staff meeting' tomorrow morning.
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
The attempted closet masturbation was unforgivable.
That was the most fucked up I've ever seen him. He had the fucking Canola Oil!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I think the lady at jack in the box started crying when we put in our order.
Yea it's also hard to turn down a man asking you out with a chicken sandwich.
GUESS WHOSE BEST FRIEND IS OUT OF PRISON!
He slapped my ass... He best ask me out. Or figure out how to unslap my ass.
Ugh it's 2016, why can't our bodies just shed fat on their own
I balled in the shower for 20 minutes, rolled up to the meeting late looking like a gremlin, and my one night stand was standing there in a suit
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