i feel like arbor mist is too classy for that. you need a colt 45
Yeah you're right. The one time when arbor mist is too classy
Someone in my history class just FB messaged me saying they highly suggest I put my sunglasses on. He is sitting 18 rows in front of me...
you should give me head with plastic fangs in
Having skype sex with him in the lounge at 1:45am...THIS IS WHAT HE DOES TO ME
Did we literally take a cab across the street
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
Did you eat 9 cans of raviolii last night?
Come on man nobody wants to admit that
Someone at all my grapes... if it was you or one of your hoodrat friends I swear to god I'll shit in your shampoo
I have been referring to it as "thanks for getting out of me day" all week. Do you think they will still take me to brunch tomorrow?
No sex in the champagne room. The champagne room being my life
Just think of your bundle of joy thats on its way. And how hes gunna rip your vagina apart
Die.
i'll talk to you in three hours when you've stopped foaming at the mouth and your eyes have rolled back into place
And I am bleeding like slutty girl #1 In a horror movie
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
Randomize
