I could have mohawked her pubes.
my summer class's final was canceled bc it interfered with the world cup. he is giving us all A's on it. I love europe
Its Friday night, and I'm sitting at home watching are you smarter then a 5th grader, drinking vodka. I got every single question wrong. Clearly you see where I'm headed in life.
It's like there's a party and my mouth and everyone's throwing up
I vaguely remember walking down the highstreet with a plate of K offering lines to passers buy. I sold a line to a taxi driver.
15 year-old stoners have those problems. we're college students dude. dont be like that...
Wearing the 'Let's Party' thong feels weird without you...
Halloween is the only night where I would ever end up getting a guy's makeup all over my face
Tell me I'm the only person you know who could punch someone at the bar, get escorted out, smoke a cig with the cop who almost arrested me AND get the security guy who escorted me out to buy me drinks.
Wow. The LSU Tennessee game is on here and the LSU cheerleaders are stupid hot. Its weird having a hard on. At a bar. On a Wednesday. By yourself.
My sister's exploding appendix just cock blocked me...
I got myself off in the shower last night for the first time ever! I just looked like I was playing a game of twister.
What happens if you die with an erection? Does it stay hard? Disclaimer: I'm high.
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
I snuck a teenager into a club last nite, I felt like such a criminal. It was Awsome
Randomize
