stephanie tanner's voice is so fucking annoying. no wonder she resorted to crystal meth.
I just bedazzled my weight watchers points calculator. You can tell I'm gay.
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
It's ok I'm watering my plants with a 40 in my camelback, people are staring
I'm going as either a recovering alcoholic, or as a guy who came to the party straight from work. Too literal?
pretty sure 5 days for a bachelor party in Vegas is too long when even the stripper giving me a lapdance says "wow that's a long time!"
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
Yeah I'm at the doctors getting a shotand don't know how to tell them I'm still probably drunk from last night
I know it sounds all cute and shit that I wanted him to be with me last night, but it's not cute. I just wanted to fuck.
I dont' remember leaving St. Cloud, getting home, or apparently directing traffic in the middle of the fucking street while black out drunk.
I hooked up with Spider-Man on the hood of Santas car. I kept saying that he could shoot his web at me. Also I found Waldo. Overall good night.
I didn't know. I guess I really haven't had that much time for drinking lately. I mean, outside drinking at home/work.
Tomorrow's lesson plan is going to be on hangovers and why drinking during the week is never a good idea. I hope my boss approves.
I stole a block of cheese from the party last night and put it in my purse but I got so drunk that I left my purse on the floor and my dog ate it.
She called a 10 year old handsome and we gave her a look that was equal parts confused and “what the hell is wrong with you”
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