i just walked in on my sister drunkenly sobbing to sarah mclachlan. its time for an intervention.
didn't that happen to you last weekend?
shut up.
You only like me because I'm a challenge
You already blew me
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
Yes. It's so easy to pack to leave when you've thrown away half your clothing cause it smells like vomit.
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
Two dudes got up on top of the pianos and danced shirtless. They didnt even get kicked out. I love vegas
..But I'm still alive. And thats the main thing
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
Are you still going to come over for your post Alcoholics Anonymous beer?
I wanna just rip ass and see his reaction but i bet itd be better to shatter that illusion when hes drunk
I lost the back to your old name tag last night in a girls shirt. It got me a view of some titties though, I guess in some way you're still doing your brotherly deeds
That was the night I realized I need to grow up and stop eating mushrooms with strange 40 year old men in convertibles.
I learned so much in Pittsburgh
I vomited out my contact lenses last night
Well obviously we have a ghost in the house who’s taking showers in your bathroom and doing our cocaine.
That man fucks like a champ. The sex was so good I did him again in the morning just to be sure
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