Dude, I just had an awesome rave/orgy with like bunch of hot Asian chicks on a cable car. It was like being in a Gwen Stefani video, cept w/o the bad spelling
God, I love San Francisco.
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
These 3 days between Christmas and new years when all the bosses are on vacation are essentially a competition to see who can do the least amount of work
At what number of girls whose last names are stored in your phone book as drinking establishments does it become excessive?
There's an Captain Planet marathon because of Earth Day. I can't NOT turn this into a drinking game.
What if we had a smart house and we could just say "baked" and it would rain donuts?
FYI I just found your friend. Asleep. In. My. Kayak. In. Pool.
Setting up an obstacle course with ladders, hurdles, and a spring board to the pool. you down for drunk races through it later?
Our foot and a bit height difference is kinda fun, except she's so tiny that after we ate burritos it looked like she was pregnant. I had a confusing bonner.
FYI, grandma is already drunk and using a bed sheet as a table cloth.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Thanks for setting a pic of your balls as my desktop background. You'll find you're cc'ed on the mass email of it.
someday i'll meet a woman who will love me for my marvelous breasts and ignore my many character faults.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
My husband is waiting until son is napping and air humps as a seduction tactic. Pray for me.
Randomize
