piano lessons. No girlfriend. What's up.
He ripped my extensions out during sex, not noticing until this morning when he saw them on the floor. I told him they werent mine and he went and threw them in his sister's room.
I wish i could tell a story about guys I know without the phrase "and then I blew him." coming up.
Dating my ex's drug dealer.. best. revenge. ever.
ur roommate just sent me a pic of us fucking. i'm not coming over anymore.
God he's so convenient, drugs, an parties all in one person. He's like the Walmart of delinquency.
I have to go buy generic plan b after work. I don't even leave for the new semester for another 11 days. I think I just leveled up in sluttiness
I've got to stop fucking tourists. If Chicagos piazza is anything like their dicks. I'm moving.
All I remember about last st pattys day was I was in a bathtub with full bubbles, fully clothed, drinking out of a flamingo lawn ornament that someone cut a hole in.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Is it bad when your own grandmother calls you a whore?
I am witnessing a blind guy whip ass at beer pong
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