You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
she doesn't hate you. She just thinks you need a personality adjustment, speech therapy and weight watchers.
you jizzed all over me and yelled "makeover"
If you weren't supposed to have sex with your ex then they wouldn't rhyme.
Giving the kids Children's Claritin and calling it candy.....Is it setting them up for drug abuse later?
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
he screamed PILLOW FIGHT and hit branden in the head with a pillow that had a fifth of vodka in it. then he asked why he wasnt laughing
I love her to death but its like you have to do 5 lines of coke to be on her level.
He sent me a poorly photoshopped picture of his shaved dick wearing a Hot Dog on A Stick titled "Shorndog"...
Andy was trying to screw his door shut from the inside so no one could get in.
He texted me at 2am telling me to come get my American flag from his place, if that's not code for sex idk what is
i just told him to get ready, because I'm going to be taking out my anger over the Super Bowl out on his penis.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
I AM OFFICIALLY LICENSED TO BE A LESBIAN
Randomize
