My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
Why is it that you only get to have sex when you haven't shaved your legs in six weeks and are wearing period stained granny panties?
I hooked up with a Michael Jackson impersonator last night. Too soon?
The dutch village is so much worse hungover. Fuck them and their wooden shoes.
Stop blaming waffle house for all your problems
Dude I still wanna know who I had sex with on new years eve
Dude just slipped a $20 into the jukebox at that restaurant we were escorted out of last Mardi GRAS. Hope they enjoy Justin Bieber's Baby cause they're gonna hear it 40 fucking times.
THC water in my coffee on the way to work. How's your Tuesday?
Aparently i was the only guy at her parents bbq throwing up in the pool so Im the asshole right...
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
I'm curious as to what my outfit choices drunk me made for this weekend.
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I was in a penguin suit. Dick out. I am confident in the value of my pic.
My cat is watching me play with my new vibrator
I've had your balls on my face a bunch of times so the least you could do is buy a girl some dinner.
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