What should our trivia night team be named?
Define Statutory
I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
stayed up until 6am doing my presentation on buddhist art and the practice of chanting. took shots. did drugs. the powerpoint now includes a sesame street style game (with chicken/puppy clip art), an xzibit music video (and quotes about section eight and eating steaks), and a reference to a german metal band (universe). this is going to be the best presentation ever
I woke up with glitter in my wounds.
No but the chipped one is crooked now. Clearly I didn't use my hands to break my fall. I used my face
Should I feel guilty that my husband is cheating on his girlfriend with me? I mean, we're not divorced yet so I still have dibs, right?
some girl at the bar told me my beard would tickle every inch of her body till she joy puked her face off.... that was so random and odd i just had to buy her a drink for having the guts to say it to me. WTF
OH MY GOD I JUST WANT TO GO HOME AND FART ALL NIGHT.
I just started talking about my sextoy because I wanted things to be normal again.
The majority of the reason I want to get my pilot's license is so I can use the argument "FUCK YOU! I'M A PILOT!"
Not as much as my roommate, who is in the middle of one of the pictures throwing a lawn chair at a cop car lol.
My horseshoe mustache feels at home at this bar.
You know, we cock-blocked like 5 people last night. It's like we're her vagina goalies
I've decided it's okay if I take a pregnancy test every month. Then I can be like, "Good job, self, way to not procreate this month!"
Randomize
