i dont know what it is, i just found it in my pants.
I wish that guy wasn't missing teeth
You say "arrested with two drunk girls" like it's a bad thing....
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
I was tripping balls on the bathroom floor and his dog walked in. The lights in his bathroom have motion sensors, so I thought his labrador retriever was Jesus.
It's raining. Will need ride home and blow job.
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
Ones vagina should not have the same slogan as a can of Pringles.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
Gays age differently than straights. 29 is like 45 in gay years. Next year I'll be in adult diapers and applying for medicaid.
You sent me a picture of curly fries with no explanation attached. This is the first time you've texted me in 2 months.
So I totally had sex In a teepee last night at that wedding reception.
Quick question—how good are you at digging holes? I mean, besides the one you've dug for yourself. asking for a friend
I feel like I got hit by a car. But a small car, like a Beetle or a Mini or something.
My parents are being so annoying about my colon.
Randomize
