Well, I'm a guy so I don't have one, but if its anything like the inside of my nose, yes, vodka would burn.
I can only imagine the horrible things my future wife is doing on spring break right now.
She said "I only hook up with guys I'm dating"
So... What happend then?
We dated for an hour, i broke up with her after. BOOM.
No no no no no. Not interrested. She looks just like Kim's fat booth picture. Only real.
I learned 3 things lastnight....1. Turkeys are related to the t-rex. 2. Whales have leg bones cause they used to walk. 3. I will sing drunk in the waffle house, but not during karaoke in the bar
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
your house isnt even gonna be on google maps after this party
They didn't have a "sorry I was late for your birthday party because I was getting arrested" card.
I like making it seem like it's at least a little bit difficult to hook up with me
At 38 I had to open a Snapchat account to communicate with my 21 yr bf. where is my life going.
Umm...sounds like a maybe. I broke my nose and have surgery next wed but if I'm ok by Friday I'm down.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
Just because I also want a blowjob doesn't mean I don't want to just see you too.
My throat is burning
Thats because you proceeded to drink the salsa because you thought it was alcohol...dumbass
The cat's telling me to stop taking acid, and to start doing the lords work. I'm almost 99% sure he's talking about the dark lord.
THIS CAT'S GOING TO TURN INTO A SNAKE AND KILL ME! GET OVER HERE NOW! BRING YOUR WAND.
Randomize
