the entire time we were hooking up i couldn't stop thinking about the bengals. thoughts?
operation harelip BJ is a go
I put the beer in my little red riding hood basket.
pop tarts are not kleenex
So basically i got outta bed and started peeing on the a/c unit..when my roommate tried to stop me i looked at him and said "i got this"
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
Couldn't see or hear that well because she hit me on the back of the head with a bat. That is my excuse. Also the gin.
Can u check his last FB check in, then come pick me up from there. Blame it on the tequila
I'm in the room..It's full of lost souls and sadness. I can taste the salt of their tears. This final might take a few freshman today..
when i got home she was standing in my front yard not wearing a shirt and halfway crying/ halfway laughing
Yeah but then I feel like it's worth it like bro you just stabbed me the least you can do is get me a fuckin otter pop.
i took four shots of tequila, threw my fist up in the air, then went around the party showing everyone how to do the ninja turtle handshake. that's the last thing I remember
I have visions of guys in cheetah costumes with suits over it pissing on a children how are you
you take my contact solution?
drank it last night then filled it with brandy for the plane ride.
Oh fuck, I'm officially a cougar..he's got the same name as my grandson
Randomize
