Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
No shame. Just smoked a bowl with a Norwegian. Feels like something to cross off a list.
shes perfect for him. shes never seen a penis so she has nothing to compare his to.
I'm pretty sure it all started going downhill last night when they suggested I see how much sambuca I could fit in my mouth
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy
first one here with a pint of chicken lo mein, aspirin, and diet green tea ginger ale, gets a full effort bj the day after tomorrow.
I will not be held responsible for my vagina's poor judgment.
is one penis in the hand worth one better nicer penis in the manscaped bush?
Oh yeah and one of the strippers brought you chips and water when you were passes out next to the toilet. So that was nice
I just had a twenty minute discussion about endangered breed dog breeding with an Extremely drunk guy
So many questions...
Mid-fucking he screams "YOU CAN'T VOTE FOR TRUMP"
I realize my mistake but don't you dare school me in cock, young man
I've had more orgasms than showers this week.
I figure I since I made out with him that I at least had to save his number in my phone.
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