im sorry but my first introduction to your dick isn't going to be a pic sent from the men's room
Oh so it was one of those "I shouldn't have gotten in a cab with a random 21 year old girl" kinda nights.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
Hardly remember what he looks like and the man has seen me passed out spread eagle. I begin this journey with such a disadvantage.
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
No, they seem attractive after SIX beers, after three they're just the gender you're looking for.
I rolled over and my thoughts became words and I said "oh fuck not you again" he didn't think that was too kind and asked me to leave
can anyone on this campus do anything sober?
To be fair, I'm probably one of the better candidates for the role of 'baby daddy' in this town
Hey. My eyes swollen shut and I can't find my shoes. How was your night?
Itd be nice if there was a level of interest in me somewhere in between the indifference and obsession that I've only been attracting
REWARD BLOWJOB!! STAY RIGHT WHERE YOU ARE I'LL BE THERE IN FIVE MINUTES.
Her tits are absolutely massive. Like ripleys believe it or not shit
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
What I'm doing now is like me taking a bagel, dropping it butter side down, leaving it for six years, picking it back up, and trying to fuck it
Randomize
