okay pat passed out under dana's car
I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
god, you should never be in the FBI. you'd give away america's secrets to any boy who asked.
Just fell asleep during a bikini wax. Thank god for day drinking.
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
That's right. If she can't abide by the rules then she gets booted. It's like survivor booty call edition
All i know is we had 4 people on a tandum bike, and told the cops we couldnt stop because our momentum was so good.
Also, that dude projectile vomiting all over the living room was the perfect distraction for me to swipe the booze and run.
I'm with Tony. He said he volunteers his ball sack for waxing but you will have to wait a few weeks. It is a freshly shaved sack. I guess he thought he was gonna get lucky. Wtf?
Me and him getting it in is for special occasions only. Like Christmas and when they bring the McRib back.
21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers
At 12:16 am. We just got out of the truck and went behind it and fucked. With 3 people in the truck. On the side of the road. As cars drove by.
I can't help the fact that i'm turned on by white boys that look like Jesus
Props to the guy blatantly doing coke in the bathroom at the bar. Walked out of the stall with a credit card in hand, sniffing loudly and shouting "choo choo"
please let it be arousing that I used numbers to figure out how well I'd give you head
It's technically 2016 but since I haven't gone to bed I'm still counting it as 2015, so I'm gonna drink all the alcohol in my house so tomorrow I can become the better version of myself that I'll be for 5 minutes.
I got my gum stuck on his balls.