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• (215): View more from Pennsylvania

  and if it starts getting weird im just going to tell him i used to be a man

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• (910): View more from North Carolina

  Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.

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• (814): View more from Pennsylvania

  moving back to school this early was a terrible idea we already used up our bail fund

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• (334): View more from Alabama

  How can you turn a kayak date down? I'M TALKING RIVER HEAD HERE.

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  Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags

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• (802): View more from Vermont

  Just thought to myself "I should practice shotgunning a beer before Wednesday." I don't think my GPA is going to like this semester.

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• (864): View more from South Carolina

  turns out that the cat the james was trying to catch was a raccoon. call me when you get this, i need an ER buddy

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• (304): View more from West Virginia

  I'm eating crumbled blue cheese out of Tubbaware. My life is nothing.

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• (204): View more from Manitoba

  God only knows how I ended up there doing crown royal shots to the titanic and insighting a bar wide shit fest when I asked the dj to play levels

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• (205): View more from Alabama

  Just drug him and when he wakes up be like "you just woke up from a coma, we've been married for the past five years." It'll be like the Vow but fucked up.

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• 

  21 Rideshare Drivers Had to Drive These NSFW Passengers

  Read it at the TFLN blog
  

• (615): View more from Tennessee

  She was a little hefty, so I turned on the strobe light in our room. Everything looks better with a strobe light.

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• (805): View more from California

  Either you got hacked or we need to have a serious discussion about sending penis enlargement emails to your straight friends and why you shouldn't. It sends the wrong message.

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• (702): View more from Nevada

  Excuse me, but I got friendzoned and all I could think about was the fact that I didn't have my underwear back on yet.

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• (908): View more from New Jersey

  do you ever just look around and think about how great it is to have depth perception? Like it's really, really cool when u think about it

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• (503): View more from Oregon

  Maybe you can just make seal noises during sex and we can call it good

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• (420): View more from

  Oh damn it. Let me get a beer. I can't take anymore bad news. Hold on.

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