we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
I think your mom looks like a breed of donkey and elephant, but her boobs are perfect
I bet they all look and smell like Amy Winehouse
A homeless man in dtwn SF was blasting lil wayne and singing at the top of his lungs. I kinda wanted to give him my life savings
the best part about watching a meteor shower at 4 am is being able to masturbate in public and drink hot chocolate at the same time.
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
cum and cheesecake for breakfast...don't fucking tell me pride week isn't awesome
So I'm seriously not complaining - but I just fell ass backwards into a Tuesday night threesome. Sober
They're re-releasing Titanic in 3-D. Can I interest you in a joint venture to create the greatest drinking game of all time? I think yes
if I just puked into my own hand, but then cleaned it up quickly, quietly, and calmly, am I still a trainwreck?
First thing on my "to do" list- get sober for community service.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
Dude. My knees have no hair on them and they're bruised. My thigh is killing me. I have about 1000 texts to about 5 exes which I horribly regret. I have pictures of my own penis on my phone. I can't find my iPad. And I have work in an hour.
Btw, the reason I have a black eye is bc I needed to puke so hard yesterday morning; I whipped up the toilet seat so fast that I railed myself in the face. Then spent the rest of the day more carefully puking. Kind of why I'm not in the mood for drinking.
Standing naked in my kitchen making nachos. I love my youth.
Randomize
