I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
he took his pants off right in front of me then just stood there so i went for his boxers and he said he was waiting till marriage
he thought he was parachuting out of a plane... talk about a bad trip.
and ill be dreaming of you. not in a creepy way, but in an inappropriate way
I'm still trying to figure out how you came back with chinese food, and a spoon covered in icing saying 'cake..'
Don't know how I even got in. I pulled my id out and threw it at the bouncer, and he just picked it up, checked it, and let me in.
Yes theres a double standard. Get over it. Fuck the critics and go be the slut you were born to be
We were dancing and she was clawing my stomach like a fat kid getting to a half broken pinata.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
I just duct taped myself into my costume. I apologize in advance if you find me in a compromised position involving duct tape and underwear when you get home tonight
OH GOD NOT SANTA BABY. NO NO NO. YOU'RE LIKE 85. OMG MULTIPLE WOMEN. NO NO NO STAHP.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
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