I have to get up uber early tomorrow. Which is why I started drinking early today
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I would give my right arm to go back to college. Or maybe not. Would be kinda hard to pick up guys with one arm. Then again, knowin what I do now...I could take any freshman bithc with only one arm.
found a naked boy completely buried under a pile of her clothes and terrified...she says she was "saving him for later"
Have you ever made a sandwich from swedish fish and tortilla chips?
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
She's locked herself in the bathroom with a tub of icecream and she's watching my little pony on her phone. We know it cause she sings with them.
Its what im here for. Critiquing penis photos.
Wine floats aren't as good of an idea as they seem
You said that about some fat chick sitting on the base of a lamp post and puking. Downright heroic.
I have a calendar reminder for world domination today, you wouldn't happen to know anything about that would you?
You don't know how emotionally damaged I am from crashing into that park maintenance van. I'll never ride a bike because of it.
I'll just tell you, some how when we were having sex on Friday my collarbone got fractured.
I just met a stripper in the light of day who I ate a candy bikini off her body. This is how my weekend is going.
His dick is pure magic - dark, powerful, beautiful magic. It's the Elder Wand of penises
Randomize
