An ad on my facebook says "don't be THAT girl". Its like it knows.
I hid 4 bags of cocaine in your house. Have fun finding them
he fucked me so hard my future children felt it
I'm going to come in a little later this morning....there's no heterosexual way to say this....$1 flip flop sale at old navy
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
you know it's time to start studying when you've procrastinated to the point where you're reading your roommate's ex-boyfriend's wall posts from 2006.
Sorry but i am wayy to hungover to take mom to her AA meeting.
Wont she be proud, Hailey.
He fucked a girl named Oreo... He deserved syphilis.
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
I just pulled a piece of cookie out of my bra in the middle of class. I'm forever alone.
We were Chugging coronas for the soul purpose of launching limes out of the 3rd story window, I'd say it was a good weekend
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
I accidentally made jungle juice last night.
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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