It doesn't matter if they shave you or not, you're still susceptible to the staph infection.
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
i don't think you understand, blowjobs are like flowers for guys.
im downtown. alone. lost. drunk. dressed as santa. dont find me. i just heard someone say mechanical bull.
whoever set the energy saving light timer in the lobby bathroom cleraly has no concept how long a work dump takes
look at his last status update. 3:41 a.m. "i love u and miss u already egg burrito. happy trails friend." OF COURSE HE SMOKES POT.
After the Patriots lost I punched him in the face. But I still feel like that isn't a good reason to dump me.
You know it's been awhile when the imagery of fucking AT A DENNY'S gets me really turned on.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
I'm just opting for alcohol abuse, ramen and cuddling with my dog for now.
He kept squeezing my butt and telling me how smart I was
Just called the boss a "cunt baguette". To her face. This is why I can't drink with people from work. Know of anywhere that's hiring?
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
Ohhh the usual. Laying in bed reflecting on my decisions
He said we had an hour long conversation about how awesome I was.
Randomize
