Ryan Reynolds porn could be a WMD. Have a giant TV on the front of your tank, and just drive around playing it. Everyone dies of orgasm overload.
That's it. Iraq is done. Everyone dies, game over man.
would he be offended if i told him that "national coming out day" is october 11. thats subtle enough right?
Then he showed me his sketchbook. Every drawing was a hand in different 'fingering positions'. Dear JESUS.
thanks for being the calm eye of my shit storm.
Remember that time I tried to pierce your nipples while high... it's like that, only with more blood... and less nipples
we used the fire extinguisher you had been cuddling with to decorate the cop car while they were inside arresting everyone
Why is there soup literally in every orifice of my body?
Do you think I shall pursue this journey to the center if the dick?
If you've never been pounded by an Eastern European body builder, I would highly recommend it.
In all fairness that 65 year old man looked 23 in club lighting so you can fuck right off
My TA is here with a sombrero and an entire bottle of Svedka. Skip jury duty.
Dude, I'm telling you, date younger. He brought pizza, made me squirt twice, and then left to immediately go to brunch with his mom.
Little does she know that you've out-sourced your conscience to a girl who doesn't even wear pants on a regular basis
My thoughts mid terrible hookup: do people normally read a magazine right about now?
So then edible panties?
Jesus no he likes candy too much, I'd lose a lip
Randomize
