also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
How was dinner with ur grandparents?
I was really blazed and scared they'd catch me, so when they asked about my day I was concentrating really hard on not saying smoking that instead I honestly said "Well, I had sex on your pool table, Nana."
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
How are you going to come here and fuck on our couch ? That's everyones couch
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
Ok, in complete transparency, I am eating a cookie on my bed naked while reading a Halo novel.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's gotten to the point where waking up in my own apartment is a surprise
One day, I might be old and married wishing I could bang everyone... and that'll be a problem. So I feel in my heart it's something I need to do.
I cuddled with a man named Pickles
I woke up with a shot glass nestled between my boobs like a baby bird.
I tried to get the guy I like to “spit shake” on a sexual bet... why am I such a bro fml
Dude we were sitting at my place stoned as fuk then someone knocks on the door and it was my neighbor giving me a huge box of cookie dough. Magic of weed.
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