No, you can still breathe under the balls.
i got last night's adventure to take the garbage out when he was leaving. my vagina is THAT good.
id like to point out that while i was just peeing a condom fell out of my vag.
We had a race to see who could chug their vodka tonic faster. College doesn't seem to be working for me... I'm getting exponentially dumber
HOW DID YOU GET DEPORTED FROM THE BAHAMAS
Remember that time we got drunk tomorrow
only i would grind with someone to harp music at a gay wedding
I don't remember... but I heard a cop threatened to pepper spay my dick
When nipples stop being hilarious I'll stop getting them out in public.
Nothing brings compassion from a group of cafe workers like walking in and asking if they have a 'hangover special'
Lmfao a voicemail screaming about you partying with your tits out and a text at 3 am saying you went too crazy... this should be a good one
I need a genital shamwow being this wet.
DROP EVERYTHING! Gatta go get tested for herpes, lets make an adventure out of it.
Want to help me look around town for my shorts from last night?
In case you're wondering... Yes walmart will judge you for buying vodka and pickles at 645am.
Randomize
