doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
I realized that I've made out with a different boy almost every time we've gone to mcgoreys....I don't need a boyfriend...I have that bar
The crowing achievement of my life is still the time I made a 3 course meal out of things I found in the dumpster.
i was calling myself "cat the lion" and tried eating the computer mouse because i thought it was "my prey"
I kept pulling the $1 bills off the stage and told everyone "no no no she has to work for this money"
Woke up next to a half eaten California burrito. It was tucked in.
He leaned in to kiss me and I dodged him but i fell on the floor. I guess I never got up cuz I woke up on the floor and he was in his bed
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Why is your name on a gluestick in a plastic baggy stuck to my door?
It's times like this I miss having my nipples pinched
As long as I don't spend the half the week passed out/fucked up on Klonopin and no one dies, this will be the best week I've had all semester.
I look like I just got gang banged and I'm wearing a Taylor swift t shirt. It's not gonna be a pretty breakfast.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
what do u think we would be doing right now if we were together
Urinating on unicorns
Randomize
