Drunk x Brooklyn = problems getting home. If I don't make it you can have my computer and my bitches. You're welcome.
i can't believe i never thought of this: farticle man
hahaha my homeschooled cousin put up graduation pictures. it's just her standing in front of her fire place. With a hand made diploma.
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
If you fuck her, Im going to call you and I want you to cough 2 times.
My life now consists of 2 time frames. BV before vibrator and AD after death of my sex life.
We're about to go to a party titled 'Night of 1000 Jello Shots".
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I just explained it as we hate everyone in the world more then we hate each other. Thus making us friends. Plus we drink...a lot
I think drinking is the foundation of our friendship
My therapist thinks I shld paint u something to show u my appreciation 4 ur friendship. 1) she must think I'm rite on the brink of no friends 2) this is real
You tried to order fondue take-out.
From Taco Bell.
Nobody's dick fell into my mouth tonight
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
I hope every time you eat hashbrowns you think about me, the awesome sex we had and how great we could have been.
I'm noticing I drink less and do fewer lines when I do both together.
Now that's what I call smart money management.
Randomize
