mmm... i enjoy making beautiful women smile
Dude you just kept yelling "She was my first asain!" right in front of her.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
Ughh on my way to the bathroom now... literally just puked on myself and cleaned it off with a hot dog bun... I love tailgate
My vagina senses are tingling. I know your here.
Just had a brita power hour to try to counter act all the wine i chugged last night.....fucking franzia
I bought everclear. Bring your party pants and some addies
You're not gonna punch me in the face again are you?
I made the jerking off hand motion to my mother by accident this morning. It was awkward for everyone involved.
There is always the bar, but 2 30 on a Tuesday just screams alcoholism
I woke up to my roommate checking my pulse
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
Wandering around the streets of Baltimore at two in the afternoon. Just offered a job as a stripper. Think I should accept?
Try an internship first, see if you enjoy it.
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
Randomize
