the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
were with a gay guy with a minnesota accent. think about how funny that sounds.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Was just walking through the park by the river. Saw some random in a tree, we climbed up, blazed with him and bought a bag. In the tree. Real shit.
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
If by date you mean washing Pizza house down with a bottle of wine, then yes I have a date.
btw im having a "its finally warm enough for a bbq in Toronto" party tonight. bring all the alcohol you have. and hamburger buns.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
His penis looked like how I would imagine Satan's pinky finger.
How the hell does my fucking boss know about the goddamned magician I fucked?!?
I woke up the whole house screaming I need my shorts they found me in the kitchen with a bag of strawberries naked
So how often do you needs to see my tits today then?
I’m not lawful evil! I do evil things because I want to, not because of the law
I don't know, all I remember is waking up at 4 in the morning to him going down on me.
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