She's a black belt cougar in the 6th degree.
dude, my own friends sent me home from a party last night. real cool assholes. real cool
i wish everyone could be as happy as the people in the laxative commericals
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
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On a side note I can sing drakes “best I ever had” so good you’d think I was on degrassi.
You have to stop making references to your extense knowledge of 13 year old girl television programming for me to believe you aren’t homo. The Bravo line-up was one thing, but seriously
ISS teacher has a tramp stamp.
Shotgun.
while we were having sex she stopped and said, "god is always watching". Then she started again with no other words said. We were fucked up.
You insisted on drinking champagne out of the dog bowl
you looked at me, pointed to a car and silently said "the elephant parks here".
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So we just left her at the hospital. She is not ruining my Monday night
Well for starters the people who just made my burger at the grab and go just told me to "hang in there"
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
Is this a drinking picnic?
Is there another kind?
Seeing your boyfriend, side piece, and great white buffalo, all in one night? Its a sign right?
Proceed with caution.
i puked in a jesus candle last night and then denied it... i'd say it was a pretty alright night
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