She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
i understand why you think this is a bad idea but its happening so buckle up an get your whiskey
Hahahaha you would not believe what I just pulled out of my vagina. Actually you probably wouldn't be surprised.
By the way, thank you for feeding me fries when I was sitting on the floor.
You were with some girl. Your exs best friend. Your shirt was half undone and she was telling you to put your penis away. It wasn't out but you wanted to. Patron is your weaknes.
She tried to kill herself by taking a whole packet of panadol. I mean HELLO THAT'S ME EVERY SUNDAY MORNING.
Dude. He put me on a rewards point system for his dick. I have to do him favors now to build up to winning sex. This is shit.
"guaranteed dick" "anywhere - her room, my room, trees, couch"
Sorry that was quotes about you from the grad student.
In the pictures there's a flower in my hair and also a lobster, I need those things explained
If I ever look like I'm about to have a repeat of last night, hit me. Just smack me as hard as you can.
painting my nails while super high-drunk. Ended up painting my entire hands. Both.
stop texting me about your public sex.
says she who narrated getting eaten out in a movie theatre over text to me
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
i told her we had a class about unicorns together. i'd say it was a good night
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