What do you want? Don't say anything that would make me look like a pussy at the store.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
yeah that pretty much nipped itself in the bud when I realized i could see her whiteheads glowing in the blacklight
she's got a whisker from her dead cat taped to the wall. I'm pretty sure that about sums it up...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
You were so drunk that you were trying to take pictures of a MILF at the park so you could send them to Adam, but you didn't want to "seem creepy," so you used taking pictures of her son as a cover. Needless to say, cops were called.
just as they were cutting his pants off he made em stop & said "everyone knows about shrinkage right".
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
some fat dude with wolverine facial hair just walked out of your room with a snuggie. explanation needed.
I just made the answer to all my security questions "fuck you" with various levels of ! marks. I may regret this in the morning.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
WAIT DID YOU MAIL ME A KITTEN
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
I'M NOT READY TO BE AB ADULT YET!!!
I have fuck me eyes 4/5 people agree. It's like doctors or dentists but with ppl who have lots of sex and know these things.
Everyone is out there getting real jobs and I just realized I've been "washing" my clothes with fabric softener for two months.
Unless he's under 18, in which case you put him back where you found him this instant.
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