I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
it was like that last scene in "It's A Wonderful Life" but with alcohol
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
not sure if I should be concerned that my brother just stormed into my room and looked at me with a serious face and said, "I'm a peacock, you have to let me fly." oh, vicodin...
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you tried to fill your inhaler with vodka
Exactly. So you're exempt under the "I can't just fuck her to make it go away" clause of 2010.
My shoe was in my mailbox this morning. I can't stay sober today.
Found the puke drawer
She said she'll drive over, bang, and then head home. It's like ordering a pizza.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You called a girl at 4:30am to tell her "your pussy is my top priority" while simultaneously Urban Spooning late night cafes.
Well yes he stayed. He brought Guiness, them he shaved me. It's a long, but beautiful story.
I made the last cup in beer pong off the dude's hat. I also faintly remember rapping Forever by Drake during said game.
You ever sit back and realize our friendship is based off us ranting at each other with random animal photos thrown in
I seriously just had to blow dry my thong.
Don't get yourself off tomorrow. We. Are. Having. Sex. That's that. Just dont do it.
Randomize