my boyfriend just said he'd go down on me if I gave him my password to facebook
I attract so much trash. The guy that is engaged and kissed me is here so is his fiancé. I feel likeshw knows and will cut me in the bathroom might happen. If I'm not at the pool tomorrow she has blonde hair and is really flat.
Here's a fun fact your kittens ate my vomit last night
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
At what point in time did you decide the pot head with Taco Bell was more important than all your friends.
At about the same time you guys weren't burritos.
i just realized why god gave us younger siblings....to DD for us when we come home for the summers
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
Without me, you would never be able to say you partied with a midget!
She just tagged pictures of you wrapped in the "above the influence banner" like a toga.
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
I just...no. You make my soul cry. You are giving me karma-cancer. This torture of my majesticness can no longer be tolerated.
i had a tequila and emotion induced one night stand with a random stranger. senior year: infinity me: 0.
I'd rather have snapchat than feelings.
We need to get me chipped asap
HE PUT A HOLE. IN. MY. HOUSE!!!
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