Kroger has a sale on economy packs of some ridic brand of condom with a smiley devil heart on it $4.99 for 24
Sounds like a baby waitign to happen
it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
before smithy murders me i need you to know 3 things. 1) i got with smithy's little sister last night. 2) i will always love you like my own brother. 3) smithy's little sis digs anal.
I feel like abortions should bother me more
Blow job in a bar bathroom for my Thing 1 while in a onezie dressed up as Thing 2. Best Halloween ever.
I bet the Cat in the Hat never caused mischief like that.
i can hardly tell the difference between falling asleep and passing out anymore
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
If i apologize for punching you in the liver repeatedly will you explain where the grass stains on my shoulders came from?
The look on the dr's face when she asked me the last time i had sex and i responded "like an hour and a half ago" ... priceless
Do I like my job? I just bought 1/2 oz of pot from my supervisor at work. At a discount. And he said, "pay me whenever."
I had cheese pancakes which is pretty much just melting cheese in a frying pan and then eating it except youre in denial that your life is a wreck
This is the third time this month a guy I’m not dating has dumped me. How is this even possible???
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Met the hot new neighbor. She's into country music and giving really good bjs. Latter made up for the former.
Heard about your divorce. Let me know if I can do anything for you or your penis ;-)
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