I got a 69.7 in accounting. I have this whole doing the bare minimum down to a science
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
The savings from $3 shots still doesn't add up to plan-b
I was just referred to as 'the margarita slut' by an 11 year old.
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
I just saw a black chick with an eyepatch. This is a once in a lifetime opportunity.
Please stop using me as a reference for bail bondsmen.
Maybe if he'd step up his game and get a real job instead of donating plasma and trying to grow pot then you wouldn't feel compelled to write prisoners in Oregon.
dont eat that thats our sex nutella.
I'm going to have to have a long talk with god if my soul mate has a prince albert
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I feel slightly un-patriotic right now... I just got cock blocked by the Air Force!
I can't tell if my need for dick is more than my want to strangle him
can I CTRL ALT DELETE this universe
Randomize
