You act like I was drinking alone...I had the entire Verizon network with me
i can't tell if you're serious or not, but 420 is gonna be pirate themed
Well, that's a 3 inch weight lifted off of my vagina
he's wearing our apron and eating a pb and oreo sandwich. and calling the oreos "topless" since he took their tops off...
Is it mean that I just sent him a pic of my tits with the header, "say bye bye?"
You peed in the parking lot while a car was was waiting behind us. And when people walked by you proceeded to say "careful you might slip"
the beer staff turned into a beer spear way to quickly
Found her with a stray dog now called champagne, crying about how she feels a mom now. Had to take her home. The dog too.
I say go for the trifecta and maybe you'll get a medal or something. Or a baby. That's like the same thing right?
why is there blood on my car? and are we still friends?
Now when you said you'd never sleep with me, did you really mean never on a Monday or never without handcuffs or a blindfold or never on a airplane or never without lots of booze? Cus never is a pretty strong word.
Some people are good at football, some people are good at painting, and he's good at being a fuckboy. Everyone has their talents.
I think he was trying to be romantic, but the candle he had lit was the kind you use to repel mosquitoes..
Dont ask questions just say words. where can i find plan b?
How do I sound like a lady while communicating the fact that I want his dick in my mouth?
Randomize
