He moved away. I mourned his dick all of Sunday. I feel a little better now.
Make good choices ;) This is your automated cockblock message
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Just saw a guy walking down the street carrying a giant inflatable penis
Just arrived at our party
When I get home we should play "let's see how many Christmas movies we can watch before we start having sex."
I would seriously fuck her so hard, her contacts would pop out of her eyes.
Seriously? You DON'T remember putting all those Swedish fish in the waffle iron b/c you wanted "One big Swedish fish?" That waffle iron was a wedding gift.
I told her I wanted to use him as a chew toy while simultaneously licking his face.
Did she tell him? And if so, was he cool with it? If yes, date him, date the fuck outta him.
I didn't know what to do so I panicked and puked in my pillowcase with my pillow still inside.
I know I've never told you this before.. but Gyro sauce makes everything okay.
I woke up to half of the whiskey bottle gone, and apparently I showered in my clothes. Pretty good start to SB2015 I'd say?
How likely is it that we can see each other tomorrow night? I want to shave my legs in good faith but it's cold outside and my bathroom is drafty.
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
it wasnt weird until his dog watched upclose as i put a tampon in
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